Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Another one... GHA!

inglourious basterds international trailer

looking pretty damn good!

Obama Interrupted by Duck Ringtone

Viagra | Combat | Antiquing, Strolling, Sports - HURRAH!

Talking about the Grand Prix for best film this is obviously the only and rightful winner. My god it's good. So good. There's another one with "Reading" as well and I don't think I have to mention how funny that is. Here's a sneak-preview tho:

"Our reading was getting out of control. My wife and I read every night. We even started reading to each other."

Goosebump!

Jumbo funny email

Sorry for this being in Swedish. But it's by far the funniest email I've ever read and I can't help its language. A very calm and mellow email from girlfriend to (hopefully ex) boyfriend. Please enjoy:

"Jag är så frustrerad just nu. Om du nu älskar mig, hur kan du då sitta hemma när du lovat att komma och du hör hur jag bryter ihop? VARFÖR KOMMER DU INTE HIT DÅ? Snälla försök förstå denna text: Jag sa till dig igår jag blir helt krossad när du kommer sent till våra träffar, jag bröt ihop. Idag gör du samma misstag fast värre spelar ingen roll om din moster har dött, vi hade bestämt en träff den avbokar man inte för lite disk, man kommer ändå och MAN KLAGAR INTE FÖR MAN INTE ORKAR! Jag är så jävla ledsen just nu att du inte kom hit, du hörde hur mkt jag grät (gråter fortfarande och vi la på för 50 min sen, eller snarare din mobil dog KÖP EN JÄVLA FITTLADDARE ELLER LÄMNA IGEN DEN GAMLA). Jag kommer ALDRIG FÖRLÅTA DIG FÖR ATT DU INTE KOM. Det ända som skulle kunna hjälpa är en stor bukett blommor och en present, ja jag är allvarlig och det är sorgligt att jag måste skriva det för att du ska inse vad du ska göra imorgon.

Jag har gett dig så många utlimatum men du lyssnar aldrig, du tar aldrig till dig, du tar dem aldrig på allvar. Jag sätter inte höga krav, jag sätter de krav som mitt hjärta behöver för att inte bryta ihop.

Det var som Ellen sa när hon försökte trösta mig lite, först psychar han sönder dig så du blir labil, sen blir han arg för att du är psycho, vilket det är han som fått dig att bli.

Du har gjort mig helt labil. Allt är pga av dig. Jag var inte sånn här för 8 månader sedan. Jag var inte sånn här för ett år sedan. Tror du mig inte kan du fråga alla mina vänner, mitt ex och mina föräldrar. Det är hemskt att jag ens måste skriva så men du nochalerar alltid bort precis allt.


Detta är mitt sista ultimatum, take it or leave it (jag skriver på ett sätt som en cp störd skulle förstå, så fattar du inte vad jag menar är du bränd):

1. Håll alltid tiderna vi bestämt
2. Avboka aldrig mig och säg aldrig att du inte orkar träffas. Älskar och saknar du mig ska du vilja träffas, hur trött du än är.
3. Låt aldrig otrevlig när jag är ledsen och gråter, även om vi båda gjort fel behöver jag tröst i detta läge.
4. Kom över till mig när du märker jag behöver det, på direkten, släpp allt annat, hör du att jag gråter i tele så går du, 5 på eftermiddagen eller halv 12 på kvällen spelar ingen roll.
5. Lyssna alltid på mig, försöka ta till dig det jag säger.
6. Har du gjort fel eller väl kommit sen ska du alltid smörja mig även om jag först kan låta förbannad. Du ska köpa blommor och mindre presenter som förlåt.
7. Du ska inte brusa upp över småsaker, du ska lugn och sansad.
8. Du ska ta hand om mig och visa mig kärlek (punkter hur du gör det kommer nedan).
9. Säg aldrig "en sånn tjej vill jag inte ha", "du skrämmer mig", "det där känner du inte alls" (tvivlar aldrig på vad jag känner), "jag orkar inte gå dit". Allt sådant är knivugg i hjärtat som raderar minst 5 myskvällar. Varje gång du gör saker som du gjorde ikväll krävs det minst 5 romantiska kvällar för att göra det bra. Förstår du matten med det? Du kommer aldrig gå plus om du fortsätter såhär. Just nu ligger du minus ca 50 myskvällar efter alla våra bråk. Efter ikväll 55 myskvällar minus. Do you get the math?
10. försök alltid vara och låta positiv
11. ha tålamod med mig, jag är ett psycho pga av dig just nu
12. jag är så jävla känslig, deal with it, att skrika tillbaka hjälper inte en känslig tjej att lugna ner sig, att springa iväg hjälper inte heller. take it or leave it
13. Allt du säger inte fungerar FUNKAR VISST du måste bara testa helhjärtat. krama mig om och om igen, ta lite skit och krama igen, det blir bra. smörj mig när du gjort fel, försök försök försök.
14. VISA MIG DU VILL ÄNDRAS. JAG BEGÄR INTE en 100% ändring på en dag, men visa du vill.
15. en överraskning är inte att bädda sängen och köpa små godis, TRY HARDER.
16. du är med en av stans snyggaste tjejer, dags att börja leva upp till din roll som den pojkvännen.
17. skrika aldrig någonsin elaka saker till mig. och skrika helst inte överhuvudtaget.

detta är vad jag behöver för att inte vara labil (och känna mig älskad):
1. Du ska skämma bort mig med gulliga sms och samtal så ofta du kan
2. skriva kärlekslappar och lägga i mina kläder
3. boka biobiljetter eller restaurang besök i smyg
4. laga middagar åt mig i smyg
5. pussa och krama på mig när jag inte förväntar mig det.
6. prata med mig med den gulligaste rösten du kan
7. inte brusa upp och bli så arg på mig för du älskar mig mest av allt
8. är jag ledsen kommer du över direkt.
9. du ska alltid hålla det du lovar.
10. överraska mig med mina favoritblommor (jag gillar liljor, rosor, tulpaner, massor av olika, jag är inte så kräsen) och små presenter då och då
11. planera mysiga saker vi kan göra på helgerna
12. komma över till mig när du vet att jag är hemma, fast du har inte sagt att du ska komma
13. håll alltid om mig och min midja när vi är ute och går
14. viska gulliga saker till mig
15. saknar du mig mkt när du gör något annat, smsa/ring och säg det en snabbis då!
16. Förklara ofta dina känslor för mig, beskriv dem tydligt och stanna upp när vi är ute och går tex och säg "jag älskar dig för att..." och så säger du något om varför du älskar mig. det ska inte vara något vanligt utan mer en sak som verkligen visar att du känner mig. Som att jag är en väldigt glad person (när jag vill), du får inte använda den grejen btw.
17. sno min kalender och skriva in saker vi ska göra på helgen i den
18. nu har jag skrivit mail till dig i en hel timma, inte gjort något annat, lägg ner tid på mig. planera och planera och planera. visa ditt engagemang och lägg ner din tid.
19. leta upp brunchställen flera dagar innan det blir lördag.
20. kolla väderprognosen och planera en picknick dagen innan. säg att du vill ses senare dagen innan för du planerar en överraskning till mig, då kommer jag defintivt förstå dig.
21. köp/beställ något som skriker "louise" för att visa du känner min stil och mig.
22. respektera mig, alltid.

Förstår du vart jag vill komma? Förstår du vilka typer av saker jag vill ha? Spara gärna detta mail och läs flera gånger.


För sista gången Michel, kan du ge allt det jag skrivit ovan. Då ses vi imorgon 18.30 odenplan. Annars snälla, kom inte dit. Hej då."

Monday, June 29, 2009

Five or maybe ten times

My computer is going haywire on me. Completely losing it and insanely annoys me when it from nowhere, shuts itself down. Or actually it doesn’t shut down completely, only the screen. “Switch it back on again” you rant and really don’t have a clue what you’re talking about. I may not be a tech-wizard, but I have tried a lot of different options. I guarantee you. Working simultaneously on a few unsaved projects is a good measurement of how willing you are before restarting your computer. This you have to trust me on. Like now, when typing this text, I’m literally saving it almost in between every sentence. There. Just did it. And again.

Issue numero due is also comfortable. You can’t just restart the damn thing. For some convenient reason you have to do it several times. All the time you obviously hear the computer reboots itself with all the distinct sounds that goes with it. But it’s only by the fifth or tenth time it actually goes back on. “Tell your tech-genius at the office” I hear some brain howl from the smart-ass-internet-door. Thank you very much, but done it so many times it’s starting to get antique. Worth mentioning is also that the intervals between shut downs have moved from once in a while (could pass entire days) to five minute snippets. So. That’s it for me. Carry on.

Chair Fail

Still; 18 of 20


Given that it’s been a few days since the tragic abdicate from the King of Pop it still warms my heart to see that 18 of the world’s top 20 most viewed videos still contains him. And to use the eloquently put words by Senor Alex Bogusky,
"MJ. Thnk if we all had shown just a tiny bit of the luv and forgiveness during his life that we show now, he and we would have been happier.

MJ. We mocked him while he lived. Now we realize we luv and forgive. Need to consider more lovin and forgivin folks while they're here."

Sunday, June 28, 2009

In case of fire

Today I was standing on one of our balconies, looking down on the roof on the house next to ours. That house is approx 12-15 meters below ours, depending on which balcony and which side of the apartment you are at. It is also the only chance of rescue in case of fire. I felt unsure if it was smart to jump to our lowest balcony to close in another couple of meters on the gap for the actual big jump to our aligning house.

Mind you that this extra jump between balconies also puts you a bit out of angle for the rooftop and therefore not a definitive wise decision. Also bare in very clear mind that on this rescue-rooftop, huge metal beams go across it, enabling any fool judgments of angle in your jump a complete and utterly guarantee of early death. Meaning: higher balcony = better angle to the rescue-rooftop, lower balcony = poorer angle, safer distance.

Just now I got out on the balcony to see if the decisions were still intact when Jakob came out too. Told him about my grand rescue-plans – when – magic moment coming up – he told me he had reflected about the exact same thing earlier today. Only he had put a lot of thought on the actual landing. How he would touch ground and do his roll, we were both very much in agreement that the landing + roll was crucial. If you would try to jump a bit further out to avoid the first metal beam, also add a bit of distance in the jump, or go straighter down and try to catch the gap before the beam. This we were not so much in agreement of. He would go for the first gap and I would jump to the second, much larger gap and avoid being snubbed from safety by a freaking metal beam that would most certainly hit you in your roll. Realized we wouldn’t agree on this so we both went back inside again.

Now only 24 minutes between my grand early-bed plans and forgetting to press ‘start’ on the drier, and most recently the washing machine.

Billie Tweets: a Twitter tribute to Michael Jackson

Billie Tweets: a Twitter tribute to Michael Jackson

Shared via AddThis

Best commmercial ever?

Cannes Lions awarded their final lions and Film is one of the last categories. Not sure I agree with their Grand Prix winner there, bu then again; everyone's entitled of their own opinion. So instead of complaining (big no-no) we should reward our favorites instead. It's nowhere near new, but thinking of Jon, this is hard no to reflect about. The script. One day I can only wish to create something as equally epic.

"In Belike there are some friends."

"Braga fack it."

"And here she throws the cat."


Goosebum.

Detailed Rube Goldberg Nutshot


Detailed Rube Goldberg Nutshot - Watch more Funny Videos
And people say that American children aren't productive durig the summer.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

New logo design (hurrah!)

Am very proud of my new logo above and below. Hence I'm not a designer I have probably done every wrong one can make. Too many fonts, wrong colors, weird shapes, etc and etc. We love that here at By Beckett. Though there are a few elements I'm uncertain about. Not sure which yet. Will probably do tons of amends you won't care about but will be forced to read about. Like this inane post. By Beckett adores inane stuff. This we do very, very much. Fact is we are grande aficionados of it.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Grand plans for tonight:

To warm up properly for the immense BBQ day-pary tomorrow followed by the vast rooftop part on Broadway later at the evening, routine kicks in and suggests for me to, "see a kick ass movie."

Calling Ludde!

Did you also notice that someone else commented in this blog? If you haven't - shame on you and go back to rose in the park. But I can tell you it was a magic moment. A moment of rare adrenalin-rush from behind the desk*. Fact it was from Bali only emphasized on the coolness if you ask me. Adding Bali to our roster is a given ♣♣♣♣♣ in itself. Ka-ching.

*I was actually in my bed when I read it, but that's besides the point.

Touchwall project from Schematic

Touchwall Demo from Joel on Vimeo.

Besides the fact that is really cool, what’s most appealing about this piece is to see so many nerds so enthusiastically talking simultaneously about it. Excitement and pride merged as one. Grazie, Jon.

BILLIE JEANS BEST EVER MOONWALK

Mini-magic subway moment

Stood next to another crying baby in a stroller on the subway. Did my best to pretend to smile and keep my calm. Even did funny faces to the infant to make it stop but it was futile. Then this huge Latino hip-hop kinda looking guy, all dressed in multiple x-large clothing, cap on his head and bling bling all over walked in and immediately smiled toward the baby and said, “God bless her”. I thought I was startled by the surprise comment but the mother was evidently too and stumbled “thanks”, but it was nothing compared to the baby who shone up and stopped her noise and think I could even spot the glimpse of a beam on her face. Not to be too religious, but I do have strong faith in passing warmth and always staying positive. Good stuff, keep trucking.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

First song-crush

Yes, feel very sentimental.

I'll Be There Acapella

Eternal King of Pop!

Arnold gets pissed

♣ for: Dirty Deli and Smelly Deli

We have two Delis that are really close by, enabling them to be our “local delis”. The first one, Dirty Deli is closest to our office, and been rewarded its name cause of unclear decisions. It’s not too bad actually just…not the most clean place on earth, but then again so isn’t my room and I sleep there every night. Moving on. Pakistani’s who are really nice runs it, a lot of bilingual greeting phrases are exchanged and they always get all of my change in coins. The most interesting guy is by far the red-bearded one making the sandwiches. Like our doorman, Darren, he never shuts up. Problem is here it is literally impossible to interpret anything he says which makes sandwich buying intriguingly interesting. But as always a good smile and a portion of tranquil gets you far. Obviously the place deserved a good ♣♣♣+ only from the moment I spotted the red beard.

Smelly Deli
. You have to walk another block to reach this place, which immediately removes a ♣ just out of sheer exhaust. Since they have a much nicer and broader choice of menu it directly contains more unhealthy food as well (and the odor - hence the name). Which should automatically move ‘em up the ladder you think? Wrong. Remember the walk – if it wasn’t for the walk they’d be better ranked. This is America, home of obesity. We don’t do walking here. I can also never ever settle for just one thing as you pick your own food here. The decisions are endless with and overwhelming buffet and my mix often varies from fried bananas to rice and macaroni and cheese to many different assortments of meat and poultry + eggs in some shape all clustered together in a nice mix-mash. The range of food is nevertheless nice so they get a respectable ♣♣♣.

Why Arnold is in heaven, day and night:

RetroBites: Schwarzenegger's Body

No one can ever look as smug/conceited/superior/self-satisfied as Mr. Arnold. And he does it oh so well. Damn I need to watch Pumping Iron.

Retrobites: Sell Phones (1983)

"The car telephone. The status symbol of the modern executive is a frustrating device."

CBC Archives: The Internet 1993

Very cute retro video(s). There's more, much more on 'related'.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

New outfitting

A year ago I was in Shanghai working. Easily one of the best times of my life. I used to visit their fake markets as frequently I could and I tailored made shirt after shirt, bought one fake polo shirt after the other all while I just neglected and shrug my shoulders at the tees hanging on the walls with a simple, “nah”.

Recently I’ve only bought tees. Dark ones (I must wear dark clothes – I do sweat awfully easy) and it just stroke me as odd. From my approx 60 shirts I purchased in Shanghai I brought about five with me to New York. Yes. That’s five. Think I’ve worn shirts three times perhaps. Four if you count the wedding I attended a few weeks ago in Sweden. I also find this odd. From raging shirt-wearer to tee-wearer without a moment of reflection* and hesitation. Can also declare that this is the first time I have more visitors from the US than Sweden. Probably cause I live hear and the damn Analytics keep counting my visits manifold times.


*Actually I’m doing that now.

Listen up all you London people:

Smart girl, adorable approach (or an evil plan to just sound innocent and cute to make people make the same "aaaw" sound as when seeing a puppy and like her more).

Bruce Lee ping-pong

Heard yesterday's premiere of Transformers 2 was such a draaaag (get it? Paul didn't)

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

LOUD POINTS - Sharapova vs De Brito

Tie?

Two things I need to work on/do

Starting to feel all very New York and then it hits you. The moments that puts you right back at Canal Street glancing at the I ♥ NY tees tees, not knowing where all the best restaurants are when friends come visiting, being all wrong for the past couple of months which direction is north from outside the window where you sit all day, not knowing your close neighborhood like your back pocket, feeling completely lost just by the thought of taking the sub anywhere near anywhere remote (aka not the office), and many, many more stuff. Stuff that just so clear but cruel show what a tourist you still are and probably will be.

But the one thing I’m most troubled about is walking between the subway cars. I plan to do it on the Williamsburg Bridge between Marcy Av and Essex St. Out in the open and admire the view as I commit this violation to MTA rules. Twice has the opportunity emerged when I really should have just done it. When riding with crazy-boy Rasmus; there’s no way he would have turned my proposal down. Last time was today. Got on the train just upfront, just a little bit wrong from where my exit is and needed to advance forward and when a guy did just that I spotted my chance. Instead I just remained. Frozen to the ground, steadily holding the railing and hid my intentions with a smile and a stare at the other direction so no one would actually expect what I was planning on doing but then chickened out.

There's only one song right now. And it's best listened to loud

Realtime 3D Airtraffic






Pretty cool. CLICK, then watch the film.

VRgameGUN

Anything purchased at Walmart is worthy of glory and acknowledgement.
Thanks Jon.

1001 rules for my unborn son - Let's get some things straight before I get old and uncool.

323. If the maître d' mistakes you for someone famous, there's no rush to correct him.

CLICK

Darren: Rating + ♣ reviews of the doormen

Our doorman, Darren is the happiest man in Williamsburg. A very nice chap that never ever shuts his mouth. Rushes up and holds the door, discuss your day/problems/issues/whatever and other hot subjects that people have on mind. We usually talk about running, and I’ve learnt that Darren’s got a bad knee. “No you’re right, Darren, you shouldn’t run with a bad knee, could get a chronic injury and then you’re fucked for life, and then all you’ll ever do with your life is maintaining this damn lobby.” I really don’t say that last part. Damn knees though.

We’ve been discussing Darren from time to time whether he’s got a hinder or not. Forest Gump style, so to speak. Joakim is convinced he has, using the kind words, “No one can ever be so cheerful from standing in a freaking lobby the entire day”, and even if I want to agree I won’t. I like to see that one can be so happy about his work and feels blessed for what he has, not what he misses or could have had. Darren deserves his five out of five ♣♣♣♣♣.

Occasionally there’s the huge other guy I don’t know the name of, sitting in the lobby. He doesn’t get up when you come/leave, he seems to be too busy being neatly placed behind his desk with, what must be, a 4” laptop in front of him. It’s a sight that looks really, really funny and I always silently giggle to myself when I see it. Only that earns him a good three ♣♣♣.

Today was a new younger, kid in lobby. He didn’t speak much. But quick on his feet and good with the door. So a decent two ♣♣ with the chance to elevate his rating by good performance during the summer season.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

No "Lé Tour Dú Bock" this year, but some US Open

After a great Midsummer-weekend it’s nothing better than to wake up at 6am on Sunday morning. Which are always how all Sunday mornings should start. The rain was pouring down and I really, really hoped the US Open would be cancelled like it was on Thursday.

Realized that was just the glimpse of a dream and I was awake so I got up and transported my sorry ass to Union Square to meet Peter, Oskar, Thomas and Molly and off we were in our rented Chevrolet (very American, thanks) to watch some golf. Greeted by a thick layer of mud we wrestled our way through and entered the area of happenings. As we walked in jam of mud and grass I couldn’t help remember that this is what it must have been at all the festivals I never attended but so very much wanted when I was younger and smiled to myself.

Some found the mud the worse part, but as a true easy-sweater, I would have laid down in it to be relieved of the condensed humidity. Clothes glued to my body with every step. Which is always how any stroll for ten hours should feel like.

Met up with newly weds Daniel and Josefin Lönnborg (HURAAH!) and Elin. The latter showed proof of distinct skills and experience as she directed the way in hasty pace,
“The moment he has hit the ball we will relocate to green”
she ordered and acted like a proper general. A very cute general but in spite of that and the fact that I did a good effort routing and smiling, Tiger didn’t seem to have one of his better days.

Then we enjoyed our Trophy Club passes and embraced the sun when it decided to shine for a bit but Oskar and I couldn’t help to envy the Champions Lounge.
“Bet it’s ridiculous there, free of everything PLUS buggy.”
Molly told us that Champions Lounge was very corporate and we quickly relaxed.

What was most interesting about the tournament was the crowd. It was crazy. Very good crazy. They screamed, roared and clapped their hands like rampant hooligans whenever someone (especially Tiger – and Mickelson (!) did something).
“You go, Tiger – you know New York loves you brother!”
a very large man yelled but even the cheers for Tiger faded in comparison to Mickelson (is it Phil?) and he even looked teary and touched by the celebrations. This was his first tournament since his wife was diagnosed with cancer and the audience showed their immense national support. Cheesy but I liked it. Think we should always try to encourage, cheer and smile more often. Always.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Is najs

Bigger better than way bigger

TBWA LA was given a very interesting brief the other day:
“Make the November release of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. the biggest entertainment launch of all time -- bigger than any video game, any movie or other entertainment property."
Bigger than Dark Knight. Bigger than Grand Theft Auto IV, which both currently holds the number one spots on best grossing films/TV game launches in the history of time. As Rio would have said; nice. And I’d like to add, interesting to that. Make me think that it’s so nice to see that recession doesn’t apply to all.

"I wanna read more" - well CLICK then.

This is cool


Rotate and play. CLICK

Swedish Midsummer today, hurrah!

2012

Roland hasn't done anything worth of interest for a couple of... (has he ever, like, seriously?) and is perhaps a bit too obsessed about doomsday and ancient rites and environmental issues. But it's all good. At least he has a meaning and wants something with his films. Problem is they get so extremely pretentious. We shouldn't talk about 1000 B.C. Worse movie ever is not an exaggeration if you choose to use those words. Anyways. At least this looks like decent flick. A few hours well spent inside a theater on a Sunday. Trash. But expensive trash. Too bad he has to mix the stupid pretentiousness to it all.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

To Get Worms Out of Soil, Just Grunt

Obama Kills Fly Like a Ninja!

Snap



Think Ludde exceeded himself here and just earned a spot up on the podium beside me. Thank you Best Man. CLICK

Oddities From NASA's Massive Image Archive

"The sombrero-topped hombres picture here are the Apollo 11 astronauts being swarmed by thousands at a 1969 parade in Mexico City during the world tour that followed their trip to the moon. The tour was meant to show the United States' willingness to share its space knowledge, and its space heroes. Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin and Michael Collins visited 27 cities in 24 countries in 45 days."
CLICK

4th of July + Weekend + Las Vegas

A sentence to summarize my plans, ambitions and whereabouts for the impending holiday. Been planning this trip to Las Vegas since January (actually since we put feet on Swedish soil since last time). But then I wasn’t sure from where I would book the flight (destination was very much pre-determined) so I waited. And waited, and then, when the prices were high enough I thought about it for a while, just to make sure, and waited some more. It was ridiculous; the price skyrocketed during the few hours I contemplated. But I feel very proud over my mature decision though. Spending time in this American institute during a special holiday like this. Blessed might be the word actually. Proud and blessed.

I’ve been once and I didn’t want to leave when my flight left at 7am. My friends had to drag me back to our suite and packed the bag for me. It is still, by far, the worse flight I’ve ever been at. Believe me it had nothing to do with a terrible pilot (he's actually my #1 if someone would ever ask me to rank pilots I've flown with). Drunk out of my mind at absolutely gone mentally (no, no drugs) couldn’t count (didn’t know) which time zone we were in. Or why. Switched flight in New York (yieeiy, little did I know then) and I felt exactly like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas when I woke up. Or up? Up, down, left, down, turn, bottom, up again, time difference, find the next plane, I was anything but right. Best pilot ever though. When we were about to touch ground he blurred out connecting flight numbers for despaired passengers, gave us URL’s with maps over the terminals and lit the lights above the heads of those who were in most time need. I remember I couldn’t tell if my light was lit or if I was still dreaming. Unbearable. Ran around like a stung chicken in circles and even stood in those sloooow snake-look-alike-lines to ask for assistance. Got it and I was two gates and an entire hour away from mine.

“But where are you going with this story, Christian!?”

Dunno. Except it’s heaven on earth. Especially for a few, very few – not too many days. David is taking his virginity there now and I think he’s twice as excited as I. His FB-status functions as a personal ticker, slowly counting down the days. Oh, did I mention we’re staying at Wynn this time (last time, Bellagio – yes, very Vegas, thanks). In so many words; wynn/wynn.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Omelge


I think this is my aroused teenager from the Uk I was talking about. CLICK to go this magic place.

Safari

As a "violator", I now expect to "be punished with a thunderbolt to the guts!"

CLICK

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Hilarious Tuesday

Work went by like a rocket chased by gravity, yelling “please, please, take us with you, we’re stuck down here!” A lot cause of the help of Omegle. Please promise you try it. It’s hilarious (see the pattern, well the beginning of the pattern), best described by its own words: “Talk to strangers!” And so you do. Well. I sent it to selected people (guys) at the office and before soon the competition to be rejected quickest was on. Aramique won the weirdest conversation, involving the line “Mios dios” though he was constantly concerned it was me he was chatting to, Paul got rejected cause of too many consecutive vocals and I managed to arose a teen-boy in the UK – and apologize for wanting to “fist me”. I briskly told him off with, “you’ve watched to many porn flicks boy” and he instantly replied, “oh I’m sorry did I move to fast?”

Then, as proving there’s no off-switch on the genius button, I proposed to see The Hangover and Rogerio and his wife, Juliana, joined me. First time watching the cinema in New York actually, “really you’ve never been”, is he common response to that, and all I can think of is if I should be sorry for being busy with other things than going to the movies in New York. This is still very unclear.

Back to the movie, it’s what my homies* and me would refer to as, dope. Absolfuckinglutelyhilarious (now you see). Can’t wait to watch it again. Laughed so many times I missed half of the jokes. Which is their evil plan of course. Literally. What Ben Stiller call, “layered humor”. Laugh-and-miss-jokes-so-you-have-a-reason-to-watch-and-laugh-at-it-again. Nevertheless, hilarious Tuesday that is being finished off with some too hot tea (adding milk don’t worry, I’m careful about my tongue) and Seinfeld.


*There are no real homies I'm referring to.

CSI Miami - Horatio Caine One-Liners

All kudos (always) to Ludde.

Soap | Short film | Motel | Something utterly divergent

Heard it was for a soap. Than I noticed it's titled "Wego Motel" on YouTube (which makes me wanna stay there instantly). Others claim it's for something entirely different. Me, I'm just another guy posting it, sharing the love, baby. Cause it's very dramtic, intriguing and most of all different from any other adverts I've seen (lately) and keeping some sort of relevance. For your viewing pleasure:

Star Wars + present arcitecture


This was somewhat amusing. Way ahead of its time and of no surprise, Death Star supreme winner. CLICK

Pulsating Apple Wall


Just CLICK on the image and scroll down to the videos.

Comfort Wipe Commercial

Here I go, selfishly and foolishly been talking about the annoyance of peeing, when in fact I should've been discussing the extreme discomfort of wiping my own ass. So glad some ingenius Amercian's been sitting (!) home contemplating about this real issue in life and how he could solve it.
"If only there was a way...not have to lean forward...hmmm"

Monday, June 15, 2009

Here’s a contemplation to contemplate about

Lying in bed with my sheets being caressed by the brisk wind from the open balcony door. And I am ready to pee. I need to. Things are a few though. Bed is cozy. I am lazy. And the monumental reason for not wanting to go is that ever since I moved in (and I just learnt since January (!) too) our toilet is unflushable via the usual ‘trigger’. So, you have to lift the lid, splash your hand in the container, reach for the rubber-lock-thingie and lift it in order to flush the damn thing. Very tempting yes. Especially when you just did it throwing a piece of paper in it but didn’t pee. Please remember the laziness too. I know I will probably wake up at five or six in desperate need of peeing if I don’t go now. And please, anything more annoying than having to do that, with just one-two hours before you’re alarm is supposed to wake you up. A rhetorical question so no need to stuff my comment inbox. Now if you excuse me I have to dip my hand in some toilet water.

Enthralling Saturday

On my way to the bar to meet up Oskar and friends I spotted the infamous car. You know Saturday will turn out great when you encounter something like that only on your way to the subway. Then on the subway the gentleman kindly unwrapped his one-man-orchestra, including guitar and mic and started jamming right there in the subway-car. Proudly I could find my way to the bar they were located at without questions nor directions and though I thought I arrived early (5pm) I was outrageously late.

They had been sitting since 1pm and could barely sit on their chairs by the time of my entrance. Did my fair share of catching up and soon many more joined us. The place was also double interesting. It stars in Sex and the City at some point (TV-series or film – dunno) and before soon hordes of SATC-fans came and looked bewildered and stared in amusement and chuckled of excitement as they were handed their complimentary Cosmopolitans. More people joined us, including models (I love models), and when the waiters asked if we wanted to move to a larger table our devotee of intimacy made us kindly reject the request. Our table was soon getting pretty packed and so were we.

Off to some obscure hotel party that actually played Elvis Presley on the dance floor and met Sarajane and friends. This is also before the Friday with Jon and Thea at great Friday-beer place and later to Thea’s roommates + partying on their rooftop and a shish kebab before returning home and prior to the wise decision of having a “white weekend”. More on that later. Now, a paclage of Honey Cashews and perhaps some Pistachios, both still under the ingenious concept of “The Smart Alternative”.

In response to the supercar

Jamming gentleman between Marcy Av and Essex St

Sunday, June 14, 2009

When I asked if I could take a picure the guy almost bursted into proudness and replied, "sure"

On my way to the subway this thing emerge:

World's cutest Bonnie


Courtesy of aunt Anna. I think she's the only thing I miss from home. Like, really miss.

Real Street Fighter Wannabe

It is very unclear what this fella's intentions are.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

The bridge

Sitting at the dinner table, waiting for something to happen. Don’t know what but it can’t be anything. I don’t want to push it and go outside or anything. Don’t want to be here all day either.

Williamsburg Bridge
looks tempting. Sort of. But running today would be pushing it. Dirty Dancing is on TV too. Can’t help thinking that Patrick Swayze looks different from now. Haircut?

Chances are I’ll get drunk tonight. Yesterday was the start of my white-weekend. It failed. Friday beer with Thea and Jon at a great place. So great I had to celebrate with multiple beers. Then off to Thea’s rumored apartment and her room mates. We sat until three in the morning before finally taking the wise decision of going out. Filip and I ended up at a bar and talked until we both realized we were too drunk to continue our conversation.

Woke up to sunshine and cursed the weather. Now it’s getting a bit cloudier and it immediately feels better. Odds of reaching outside the door before nightfall are slim. However I don’t have too feel guilty about it since I’ve been outside on the balcony already. Twice. Very soon a third time is closing in. but now suddenly running feels tempting. I seriously need a courtesy-scooter so I can cross the bridge without having to sweat. This is America. Proud home of obesity. I’m also thinking about having a Q&A with myself soon. But that’s for very much later. Now, more tea. Oh, if nothing makes sense in this post is cause it doesn't.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Double fun Fail

I think this might be my most favorite Unoqlo site yet




Lovely work. Looped film with random pictures (bonus that all images have the playful toy-world look). When clicking on the images, it uses the clothes that turns into a pixelated version of the image. CLICK

Woldmap:

Proud to be a part of Uncyclopedia:

ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT

Please, do me a favor and CLICK on the two images. First one is Brazil, second one is the US.



Chris Jordan: Picturing excess

Jiiis...

"Woman who missed Flight 447 is killed in car crash"


Yesterday i watched the latest Final Destination trailer. Today this was sent to me. To use the delicate words of Aramique, Fate is a motherfucker.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Laundry issues

Can’t say it’s really an issue. We have a washing machine in our apartment and you never have to make a reservation. Unless any of your three roommates is using it; feel free to clean your clothes. Living in Sweden I always did laundry on Sundays. Worked well, especially since it was the only day I really had any time.

Shanghai same thing as here. Washing machine in the apartment. There I learnt (girlfriend) that once a week is a bit over-productive + something the environment wasn’t so fond of (said the girl who later spent a good hour in a steaming hot shower). So I switched to every-other week. To pleeease Mother Nature (+ her + grew on me too, I admit that = everyone happy).

New York. More of a cowboy approach. Shoot from the hip. What day? Whatever, let's clean. Yes, no, yes, no, no, ok. I haven’t gotten into routine and I feel that – not for me – but my clothes could need a more regular wash. Why? Don't like to use the word smell. So I won't.

Nuts

Developed a huge interest, or should I say addiction, towards nuts lately. Foolishly and naively telling myself that what I’ve been taught through beauty magazines (that I’ve read when visiting my mom of course) are true. Nuts are nature’s candy. Or is that fruit? Doesn’t really matter to be honest cause I’m talking about nuts now. Even the package says “The Smart Alternative”, and I trust package design and package copy. A lot. I’m an ad-man myself so I know we never lie [or even exaggerate].

Needless to say, nuts cover a wide range of variations. Favorite ones are obviously the Pistachios. But earns they’re cons for the hustle of peeling and therefore stops the continuous flow of nuts streaming in your mouth. So I switched (I still have pistachios, so it’s only a temporarily switch – or should I say – an addition to Pistachios) to Almonds. Those babies are hard to go wrong with I know. But I did. I was in decisions (GHA! These brutal decisions in life!) between the Smoked and the Salted ones and went for both (always wise, thanks). The smoked ones tasted like BBQ meat and were ok, but nothing more. Salty ones were delicious.

And just now, I bought Honey Cashew. Felt very hesitant but I have to give them a good rating. Their con is their overwhelming share of salt/sugar that completely covers them. Like a thick layer. Looks great though is probably unhealthy as hell, so they deserve their pros to. But Salty Almonds, they don’t even carry a layer of anything. Just the pure dark nut ready to be eaten. Quickly. And in quantity.

Super sweet/nice post-it stop motion

The Importance of Business Card

Since it's impossible to embed the damn thing, please, CLICK.

Hurrah! for Fab&Ida

Swim with the mermaids at Portfolio Night 7

ACDC Excel

Watch it in excel here.

SO proud


Not sure if I can take the wait. Another unknown number of days before I can put mine on? Please. This is 2009. Beam it up will ya.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Ira Glass on Storytelling

Wow: Tyger

This is how my YouTube view looks like:

Franticly annoying, yes.

Behind the counter

They keep an awful lot of stuff behind the counter at the local delis/supermarkets here. Toothbrushes, shampoo, shaving gel/foam, toothbrushes etc. if you noticed that I put toothbrush twice it’s because it’s very dear to me.

I enjoy brushing my teeth. Well. Therefore the toothbrush has grown in significance to me and something I don’t want to purchase freestyle-style. I like to read about it, feel and touch it. See if this is something that I want to put in my mouth more than once and particularly – something I would enjoy doing.

Back to the grocery store. Stuck behind the damn counter with a cashier who doesn’t really give that much a damn about your personal cravings nor desires. So, in strong need of a new one I acted upon impulse yesterday at Billy’s Supermarket.

“I want the Colgate one”, I shouted when she asked me if there was anything else. Pointed on the blue one but she persistently grabbed the wrong one the entire time.

Stayed cool but even people behind me started to get frustrated, clearly on my side with their agony directed towards the crazy lady who couldn’t depict blue from red but when she finally managed I heard them all sigh in relief (thanks guys for the support, appreciate it!).

Verdict you ask? I now have a toothbrush I’m not entirely proud or satisfied with. All because of lack of customer support and poorly located items in-store.

Jimmy And Will Ferrell Say "Let Us Play With Your Look"

Kids... So cute, always a prank up their sleeve

Doesn't it feel cool/weird/creepy that you're able to thank/refer to someone you don't know, even a "celebrity" for something. I like that anyway. Kudos to Ashton Kutcher, @aplusk, on this one:

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

US Boarder anxiousness

Was pretty sure they would escort me to the interrogation room when I touched ground Monday morning.

“Why would anyone go to Sweden for the weekend if not to renew the visa? Wedding? Yeah right. Come here son.”

Prepared, rehearsed and altered my story so many times I was sure to be convicted for just looking suspicious way before I had opened my mouth. The flight attendant at the check-in counter was even kind enough to prolong my time at her desk so she could worsen the damage on my passport while saying,

“Double-check if my almost torn passport would be approved or not – they can be quite cruel sometimes”.

This they checked twice. Both times helping to tear it apart just to "double-check" its status.

The US boarder. Queue to the desk to be rejected. Hands were sweating. Did everything in my power to look as laid-back as possible and ignore the moist. When it failed and I approached the desk I started wiping my hands off my jacket and forced my lips to form a contrived smile. Which guard would I get? Him? The guy who eats rejected foreigners just to express his superiority.

“Ever been here before?”
why do you ask me this, your computer/files must clearly state I left three days ago and now I’m back but clearly don’t.
Mumbled, “Yes three times, sir” and was about to tell him my story, including the rehearsed laughs when he didn’t say anything. I was home safe. Free.

Then I realized how it was. Felt slightly anxious that this bulldog to guard was more skillful than he appeared to be. Looks deceive.
“This time to Vegas” I blurred out in an attempt to save a situation that was about to run smoother than licking off cream from a woman’s tit.
“Where you staying?”, he asked.
Damn it, didn’t my filled in form state that? No oh, wait he means in Vegas,
“Wynn”, I replied.
“That’s nice”, he said.
“You’ve been – I mean you know it?” I staggered, well knowing that Wynn is he latest luxury hotel in Vegas and only offers suites, better knowing that this toad could impossibly afford it.

First time we made eye contact and I regretted everything I had said for over the last thirty seconds and smiled so it hurt. Brief smile from him back and he returned my passport and seventy rip-off bucks later I was at work again.

Just the name is hilarious "Brett Michaels getting hit by a set piece"

I tiled it to fit as many wolves as possible